Conflicts III

Sometimes, we're told to trust our instincts. Other times, we're told to never judge a person if we don't know much about him. So, what to do if our heart says no but it hasn't been long enough to even ask for his last name?

He's beautiful, that's for sure. I can see myself holding him and staring into his eyes, just because I think it's time I did that. But, there's something I'm not getting. There's something a little off about this. What's missing? I'm not so sure. Do I give in to him, give it some time, and put my heart on the line? Or, do I walk away now, without even a concrete reason other than I'm just not feeling as amazing about this as I ought to? (Is that even a fair enough excuse!?)

Also, what if I'm just scared? I think I'm ready. I think it's finally time to meet someone. But, my heart's just too weak for this. This isn't easy. The chase, the game, the whole process is just so hard. What if all this "missing something" business has nothing to do with him? What if the thing that's missing is my very own bravado? I may have lost it—on Essex Street, in East New York, Brooklyn.

What do I do? I'm not good at dating.