My Music Awards II

It's that time again. Grammy nominations will be announced in just ten days. As always, here are my choices.

Record of the Year:
"I Gotta Feeling" - Black Eyed Peas.
I dare anyone to listen to this and not get the urge to dance. The song makes you feel so good and I'm definitely not the only one who thinks so. With mad weeks at #1, it's clear loads of people love this track. Honorable mentions: "Poker Face" - Lady Gaga, "You Belong With Me" - Taylor Swift, "Use Somebody" - King of Leon, and "Single Ladies" - Beyoncé.

Album of the Year:
"The Fame" – Lady Gaga.
Yes! Honorable mentions: "I Am...Sasha Fierce" - Beyoncé, "The E.N.D." - Black Eyed Peas, and "Fearless" - Taylor Swift.

Song of the Year (songwriters award):
"Use Somebody" – Kings of Leon.
It's magic, through and through.

Best New Artist:
N/A.
I have been thinking about this category for a while now. To be honest, I can't come up with any new artist that's made an impression on me this year. The only true artist wholly deserving of this award is Lady Gaga, but according to ridiculous Grammy rules, she isn't eligible. She received a nomination for Best Dance Recording last year and so that eliminates her from this category this year. Confusing and ridiculous of course. Anyway, I'm betting this will go to a country act. Or probably one of those auto-tuned, processed, and potted singers like Justin Bieber, Kid Cudi, Jason Derulo, Jay Sean, or some other. Who knows? It would be really neat and truly bad ass if Grammy voters nominated the Glee Cast as a group. Certainly, then, this category will be worth a dime. Long shots: Laura Izibor and Janelle Monáe.

Best Female Pop Vocal Performance:
"Poker Face" – Lady Gaga.
No contest. If Taylor Swift is nominated here, I'm going to be very, very, very, angry. This award belongs to Lady Gaga. Period. Honarable mention: "Please Don't Leave Me" - P!nk.

Best Female R&B Vocal Performance:
"Sweet Dreams" – Beyoncé.
Honorable mentions: "Return the Favor" - Keri Hilson, "Million Dollar Bill" - Whitney Houston.

Best Male R&B Vocal Performance:
"Pretty Wings (Uncut)" – Maxwell.

Best Contemporary R&B Album:
"The E.N.D." – Black Eyed Peas.

Best R&B Album:
"I Am...Sasha Fierce" – Beyoncé.
Honorable mention: "BLACKsummers'night" - Maxwell.

Best Urban/Alternative Performance:
“Love to Love You Less” – Nikka Costa.
Honorable mention: "Many Moons" - Janelle Monáe.

Best Dance Recording:
“Poker Face” – Lady Gaga.
All.Hail. Honorable mentions: "When Love Takes Over" - David Guetta & Kelly Rowland, "Dance Bailalo" - Kat DeLuna, and "Sweet Disposition" - The Temper Trap.

It could be worse

"It could be worse."

I’ve heard that a million times. People tell me. I tell myself. They say it; I say it. It’s everywhere. You have an issue, you tell yourself:

"It could be worse."

It almost alleviates the problem. There’s a temporary sigh of relief immediately following. But truth be told, I hate this saying.

It stinks. Plain and simple. It diminishes what I feel, what you feel, what we all feel.

"It could be worse."

It takes away the power of your pain. It unfairly leads you to believe that what you’re going through is of little importance, or not important at all.

You lost your mother, but it could be worse.

You lost your home, but it could be worse.

You can barely afford to eat a warm meal, but it could be worse.

No!

Fuck that. Things are worse, as worse as it can get for you at that point. Period. I have to stop letting people try to make me feel selfish or dramatic for the pain inside me. I've got to let it be because that's how you begin the healing.

It's your worse. It’s your pain. It’s your obstacle. It’s valid. It’s important. It is yours and it is your own version of worse. Not many people will understand that.

People say such things to bring about a sense of peace. It’s like when we say “things happen for a reason,” or “when God closes a door, he opens another.” But no more. We should stop. I'm going to stop. I know how good it makes us feel to say these things but truthfully, it doesn't help one bit.

"It could be worse."

That does nothing but push the pain away for later.

How is that supposed to help?

I Got You

It’s done. I know it. It’s been done a very long time already. I’m not ever gonna push for it to happen again. I promise. There’s no need to drag you through my hell once more. There’s no need to drag myself into yours either. We need peace. But when you fall off your wagon, when you feel lost or pushed into some dark aside, remember to run to me. Because my heart is still yours, no matter who actually holds it now or in the future. You may never get to touch me again and I may never get to feel your kisses too, but my help and my ears are always yours to use.

I got you. Even if you’ve got a limited supply of assistance to offer to me, and even if you continue with your guarded talk, the dryness won’t tackle the fact that I’m gonna be nice. That’s just who Evan is.

My Radio: What I'm Listening To

"It's in the heart most times."

Bad Romance - Lady Gaga
I Got You - Leona Lewis
Try Sleeping With a Broken Heart - Alicia Keys
Feliz - Kany Garcia
Free Me - Joss Stone
Call Me - Joell Ortiz (w/ Novel)
You Belong With Me - Taylor Swift
Already Gone - Kelly Clarkson
Me Dueles - La Quinta Estación
Therapy - India.Arie
Loca - Aleks Syntek
Imma Be - Black Eyed Peas
Russian Roulette - Rihanna
Gracias a la Vida - Mercedes Sosa

Tragedy.

The scariest, most disgusting thing you'll ever know.

Gay 19-year-old Jorge Steven Lopez Mercado of Puerto Rico is attacked, dismembered, and decapitated by a man who claims self defense.

Click here.

Latin Women Pray

In incense churches
They pray in Spanish to an Anglo God
With Jewish heritage.
And this Great White Father
Imperturbable in his marble pedestal
Looks down upon his brown daughters
Votive candles shinning like lust
In his all seeing eyes
Unmoved by their persistent prayers.

Yet year after year
Before his image they kneel
Margarita Josefina Maria and Isabel
All fervently hoping
That if not omnipotent
At least he be bilingual.

Judith Ortiz Confer

an observation

The worst kind of person is the one who stops the world when he is sad but rolls his eyes at you when you are sad.

Make it Without You

I don't think I've ever been able to completely articulate my feelings verbally without crying or stopping halfway. I have never been strong enough to express myself to anyone. Ever. I can't.

Thankfully, I have this blog here and, luckily, there's music too.

Tonight, I have this on repeat. Every single line coming out of her mouth is what I've been trying to yell out for so long.

"Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart."

Dear Gentle Suitors:

The truth is out. I’m a mysterious figment of your imagination. Enigmatic and fictitious. I'm not real at all. In fact, these words aren’t real too. It's all pretend. I'm in your head. Now stop it, and let me go.